LOOKING (appearance) Thinking Acting (behaviour) What would you do?
100
What is looking COLD?
My head is down, and I have no eye contact with anyone. I also have a sad facial expression.
100
What is thinking HOT?
I am thinking "If I'm calm, they won't listen to me"
100
What is acting COLD?
I do nothing. When I speak, I mutter or have a low voice tone.
200
You hate washing the dishes, but it's one of your chores at night. Now your family criticizes you for not cleaning them well. Discuss as a group, and tell us what you would do!
*HINT* Think of Cheryl and her Dad. In a calm voice, she accepted her Dad's criticism as fair then Cheryl apologized for not keeping her promise.
200
What is looking COOL?
I am taking deep breaths. I look at the person when listening and talking. I also have a happy/neutral facial expression.
200
What is thinking COOL?
I am thinking "What do I need to do to improve?"
200
What is acting COOL?
If I am not sure if the criticism is valid, I ask for clarification then accept it.
200
Your soccer coach takes you aside after a game and criticizes you about your attitude towards the other team members. You don't understand what he is talking about. Discuss as a team, and tell us what you would do!
*HINT* Think of Diane and her gymnastics coach. She asked for clarification of the criticism, and once she understood, Diane accepted it and apologized.
300
What is looking HOT?
My head is up, and I am glaring at people. My body is tense and my fists are clenched. I also have an angry facial expression.
300
What is thinking COLD?
I am thinking "I'm not a good person. I can't do anything right."
300
What is acting HOT?
I argue or deny I did anything. I also could be yelling, making hostile remarks or use intimidating behaviour.
200
Your friend told you something confidentially and now the secret is out. She comes back to you and criticizes you for revealing it. You're hurt by her criticism since you know you've never told anyone. Discuss as a team and tell us what you would do!
*HINT* Think of Nathan and Emily. Nathan was criticized unfairly. He stood up for himself and explained his side.
400
What is thinking COOL?
I am thinking "I'm a good person, it's okay to make mistakes"
400
What is acting COOL?
I accept and apologize if the criticism is valid by listening to the other persons criticism.
200
You're always deciding what to do when you get together with your friend. Now your friend criticizes you for being selfish and thoughtless of their feelings. Discuss as a team, and tell us what you would do!
*HINT* Think of Cheryl and her Dad. In a calm voice, she accepted her Dad's criticism as fair then Cheryl apologized for not keeping her promise.






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